The Hungrumptious Blumph

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The Hungrumptious Blumph

Has your mum ever been shopping without any clothes on? Have you ever met a real life crocodile in your local supermarket? Do you long to miss a day of school and fly to space instead? If the answer to any of these questions is a loud ‘yes’, then this is the book for you. Inside this poetry collection are poems about all of these things and plenty more besides. There are poems about talking fish and chips; suicidal peas; stinking, squishy sprouts; faking illness so you can miss school; a Hungrumptious Blumpfh (and I bet you’ve never met one of THOSE before), and even a poem about my mum. Oh, and by the way, if you answered ‘no’ to those earlier questions, you can still buy this book. Ok?

What they say about Conrad’s poetry book…

‘I deny everything. I was never ill. I don’t know what you’re talking about’ – Sick Sid

‘He better not have written anything about me’ – Conrad’s mum

‘If I don’t make it onto the front page I’m coming round to Conrad’s house to swallow him whole’ – The Supermarket Crocodile.